Thanks for sharing the script, Jeff, and good luck developing it.
I thought the new Star Trek flick was a clinic on how to handle sci fi in a non-boring way. Take the movie's concept of "Red Matter" as a sort of doomsday weapon. There probably weren't more than two lines in the script devoted to the exposition of what that substance was, and they didn't even bother trying to explain how it came to be. Yet, the audience understood it fine, because we got to see the red stuff do some major damage. The only major beat we needed to know...Red Matter...some bad ass stuff.
Character and action. Character and action. Character and action. Every single scene in the new Trek movie hit these two beats and hit them hard. And guess what? The movie was a huge success and wildly popular with a mass audience. I'm trying to take these lessons to heart, myself.