First off, I'd like to thank Steven for editing this. As an aspiring writer, seeing your script edited by someone who knows what he's talking about is such an invaluable tool.
That said, if anyone has any ideas on how to link the two separate parts, feel free to mention them.
This was the first script I wrote in comic book format, going in for every panel, and I struggled with it. I'm an artist and I always assumed I could just write the script itself, and then go in and decide on the panels when I go to draw it. After writing this way (panel by panel) for a couple of months now, I must say it's MUCH easier and far better. You can get a great feel for the pacing of the story and it makes it easier to concentrate on page turners and that sort of thing.
Anyway, my plan for this script was to have it stand on it's own a short and also be a small piece for a bigger puzzle, which would be a one shot anthology of 3-4 shorts, each based on one of 3-4 interrelating characters. Later on in the one shot, the reader finds out Kevin's brother is a serial killer and his final victim is the girl Kevin fell for. So I wanted to begin the story (this, being the first short to appear in the anthology) with a scene to relate Kevin with his brother, a flashback to their childhood. I then also wanted to make Kevin's brother feel cold and distant, to hint at a changed state of mind.
I've since scratched the project, or atleast put it on the backburner for now, in favore of a couple of other ideas. I may bring it back eventually but probably not for a while.
Thanks again for taking the time to edit it, Steven!