Ok. Here's an edit of page 3's dialogue with all the captain obvious moments and the semi colons taken out.
Medium shot. Dalgleish has crouched next to the man in white overalls. The CSI in white overalls is reaching for something with a pair of tweezers.
What’ve you got Davies?
The kids covered in the same deep lacerations the other victims had.
Close up of a hand holding tweezers and pulling a small clump of hair/fur from a wound on the body
Close shot. Dalgleish’s POV. The Fur in the F/G held up by the CSI(B/G).
Medium shot of Dalgleish and the CSI. CSI is still holding up the sample. In the B/G a black land rover has pulled up to the curb.
What’s that muck all over it?.
As above except that Dalgleish is standing with his back to the reader. He looks down at the CSI.
Diesel by the smell of it, the lab should be able narrow down the source.
Good. I want you finished and this place sterilised within the hour.
Have that fixed it?
Less stating the obvious plus I got Dalgleishes name in a page earlier